One of my friends bought a house. A lot of my friends got pregnant. My sisters are skinnier than me. And so on…
Despite being genuinely happy for these people in my life, I can’t help but compare myself to them and feel some jealousy. Because let’s face it, their successes reflect back to me, like a mirror, all the things I want in life but that I have not yet accomplished.
The truth is that what good is there in being jealous? What is this bringing me besides negative feelings? All these people certainly worked hard to get what I was jealous about. Some worked long hours at a job they don’t love in order to make more money to buy a house, some worked out every day to have a kick-ass body, some faced their fears and took financial risks to launch their business. How about me? Which actions have I taken in order to have what I want? What have I accomplished so far that I am really proud of? If I have not put any effort in accomplishing something, then do I really want these things?
So let’s reflect: I don’t own a house, I don’t have kids, I am not skinny… and so on. However, I have spent my savings on traveling all over the world which was a dream of mine; I have lived in different parts of the globe which has enriched my soul. It took me time to find a partner who matches with me and with whom I want to have a family. It took me a while and some failures to figure out which career path would fit my true self. Finally, the truth is that owning a house is not as important to me as traveling.
I have realized that there is no use of comparing myself to my friends and family because first, we don’t want the same things in life or don’t have the same priorities. Moreover, instead of focusing on what is missing, I am grateful and happy about what I have accomplished so far. We all follow a different path, at our own pace, facing different obstacles, and prioritizing differently.
I have also realized that my main excuse to not do certain things is to blame it on the lack of time. However, I spent a lot of time finding excuses for myself instead of putting my wishes into actions and facing my fears. It is easier to dream in front of a movie and think you have no time to do something rather than actually being in the arena “doing”. I can be jealous all I want, if I don’t try to accomplish my desires, they will never become a reality.
In addition to exploring my accomplishments and my true desires in life, I am very inspired by what my friends and family have accomplished. Discovering their journey a bit deeper by chatting with them inspires me to achieve my own dreams. I started to ask people about what allowed them to accomplish these milestones, what were their fears, their support. Their stories actually motivate me. I am learning from them, I am getting inspired to figure out and accomplish my own desires. And guess what? My friends and family are more than happy to share their accomplishments and their tips. They all want to support me to be happier.
So how about less jealousy and more appreciation for what you have done, more inspiration for what you want to do and more steps toward realizing your dreams?